Worst films of 2006

There seemed to be an absurd amount of junk that came out last year, or it might have been that I am bad at picking movies to see. Here is a tribute to the truly atrocious.

Black Night (黑夜) – This was probably one of the funniest things I’d seen in a while. Problem is, it’s a horror movie. The only scare I got was the thought that people would actually pay to make this, and people would pay to see this. Then I remembered that I was one of them, so I just went back to laughing.

Poseidon – Like a B-grade campy movie made with a big budget.

Date Movie – In my defense, I saw this on the plane, so I think that a lack of anything better to do should justify why I saw this in the first place. Actually, I should have banged my head against the seat in front of me for entertainment instead, so I apologise.

Click – Everyone around me told me how great it is, but I really don’t see it. The whole setup is ridiculous, the story is forced, and the sentiment…they might as well have put a sign up to cue the tears. Calculated, manipulative, phony. And I still hate Adam Sandler so much it hurts.

The Chronicles of Narnia – A disappointment, because I was expecting big war scenes. I didn’t know it was a kids movie, which I guess I should have expected since it was Disney.

Eragon – The book was written by a 15-year-old, and it really shows. Take Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, find their biggest cliches, mix them together and this is what you get. They managed to squeeze in every last cliche, which in itself is an accomplishment. The unknowing kid who turns out to be the chosen one? Check. The old and wise guardian and teacher who must die? Check. The overly excited and courageous side-kick kid? Check. The villain who commands an army but only takes orders from a higher villain who never makes an appearance? Check. The list goes on and on. It’s been a while where there was a movie that you could correctly guess what would happen in the next 30 minutes and sometimes, exact lines of dialogue.

______________________________________

And the rest…

Films I saw in 2006:

King Kong
Fearless (霍元甲)
McDull Alumni (春田花花同學會)
The Chronicles of Narnia
Munich
V For Vendetta
Isabella
Me and You and everyone we know
World Animation 1
Ice Age 2
Black Night (黑夜)
Silent Hill
Election 2
X-Men 3
MI:3
My Date With Drew
The Omen
Poseidon
Superman Returns
Cars
The Shopaholics (最愛女人購物狂)
Date Movie
She’s the Man
Pirates of the Carribean
Death Note
Sinking of Japan
Snakes on a Plane
Memoirs of a Geisha
The Heavenly Kings (四大天王)
Tokyo Drift
United 93
Katzelmacher
The Banquet (夜宴)
Volver
Exiled (放逐)
The Prestige
World Trade Centre
Tales from Earthsea
The Libertine
Beat the Drum
After this our Exiled (父子)
Little Miss Sunshine
Paris Je t’aime
Click
Science of Sleep
Elementary Particles
Eragon
Curse of the Golden Flower (滿城盡帶黃金甲)
My Name is Fame (我要成名)
A Scanner Darkly
The Departed

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2 Responses to Worst films of 2006

  1. Angela says:

    boy do you watch a heck of a lot of movies gabriel! where do you find the time? the money? but then again, you’re all about movies and films ^^ say, how much does it cost to see a movie over there? here in canada, it costs about 60 – 78 HKG to watch a movie in the theatres. something i can’t afford to do too frequently since i’m saving up right now. Anyhow, i love going to your site to weed out all the bad movies hehe – i think the next movie i’ll watch might be The Prestige since you gave a good review on it. So some comments on your new blog.. i like the new layout and colors.. suits you… but the photos take sooo long to load. hmm and, “random is king”? lol.. what’s that supposed to mean? is it kind of like.. spontaneity is the spice of life? i’m just taking a guess.. =) i’ll ttyl.. and try to visit more often ok! ttyl!

  2. aquadog29 says:

    Hi Angela! Yeah I do watch quite a few movies, but not as often as you might think actually, sometimes I go months without watching a single one. How much it costs? um, around the same as Canada, but sometimes you get discounts. Spontaneity is the spice of life? Hmm why not! Hehehe….thanks for coming!

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